Universe

I was expelled from DeMolay, and my name flagged just incase i was to get involved again. it was because i betrayed the trust of my brothers and advisors, not only did I disgrace myself as a Senior DeMolay but as a Master Mason as well. I betrayed the trust that my fellow demolays and masons reposed in me. what i did was try to take money ileagally, through a checking account that was not mine. i went to california and continued to do the samething. at the time i was a dead beat and selfish, to make it worse i had a bunch of young DeMolays that looked up to me, because i have helped their self esteem and boosted their confidence in a positive manner. well anyway it took the army to make a man out of me. and once again i am sorry for my actions. i wanted to get that out. this took me some years to say but it needed to be said. keep doing what you all are doing, and spread the light of the seven candles and do not follow my path into the dark. i was afraid to consult with a brother mason or sr.DeMolay, with what was going on with me, due to pride.

Belial,

Thank you for sharing your experience. I know it could not have been easy.

One of the things DeMolay takes great pride in proclaiming is that DeMolay is a "character building" organization. One measurement of character is how one deals with failure. We all have our share of failures in life.

How you deal with this failure as you go forward in life will say alot about your character. Its never too late to go forth and make us proud.

Belial,

First I want to reiterate what Keystone said! It took courage for you to come back and make the post you made.

Second, I want to share with you one of the greatest lessons I learned from DeMolay. I learned this from my Chapter Dad Don Crowley, God Bless him! The lesson is:

A person is NOT judged by the things that happend to him, but HOWthey respond!

Everyone has trials, and everyone falls from grace, but it is how you respond after the fall that will show how your life shall be measured.

BROTHER, we are all here for you, and always will be! What kind of BROTHERHOOD would DeMolay be if we turned our backs on our brothers when they fall, and are in need!! So, even if your crime prohibits you from particiating in DeMolay or Masonic functions, it should not prohibit your DeMolay or Masonic Brothern from participating in your life "if you so choose for them too!"

God Bless you on your journey in life Brother, and keep striving to live by the 7 Cardinal Virtues!

thanks for the feedback i feel alot better on the inside beacuse for the few years i have been holding this in, it has messed with me on an emotional level, and knowing that i still have brothers out there who are forgiving, makes a big difference because even though i can never be active again i still love this organisation with all of my heart.

My Brother,

It would appear as though you were accosted by some troubles on your journey. Does this make you a bad person? No. The world is not separated into DeMolays/Masons and bad people. We all have had bad experiences.

But as Brother Kevin said, it's how we respond to these occurrences that make us who we are. If you will remember, The Art of Freemasonry is to make ourselves better, and to do that, we must realize what flaws we have in our own character.

It would appear that you have done just that, at least to an extent. May your path never falter into darkness again, lest it be to lead another brother to the light.

Perhaps your ties to us are severed "On paper" But as Kevin said, no true brotherhood would turn their back on a brother. It is merely the brother that turns his back on the brotherhood.

S&F

Belial,

Do I understand correctly that you were a Master Mason and the time you commited these crimes against your brothern and that you did it twice?

I am going to try and stay calm

Keystone, I agree it is never to late to go forth. And I truly hope he does. However, he is not 13 year old boy in his character building years. He was a man and a Mason. Not excusable. Failure is when you attempt a deed and fall short of the goal. Stealing from those who you swore to protect is a cowardice and pitiful crime. Although, there is a lot of wisdom in your statements; they are improperly implied to this man.

Kevin G, I agree that he is showing courage and humility in that he truly feels bad for what he did. The first step to redemption. "A person is not judged by the things that happened to him" Nothing happened to him: He was the aggressor. I guess that we should thank him for making those boys stronger for dealing with his betrayal. Not everyone "falls from Grace", very few actually do and those are not worthy of brotherhood or eternal life. Everyone has trials, and he was given a trial. He was down and out and instead of reaching to a brother for help, he stole from the them. in your quote..."leave the world a better place... this is to have succeeded" I guess he failed.

Cody, bad people steal. good people don't. bad experiences, yes, converting to crime as a result, NO. Again, you guys make good points, I would never turn by back on a brother... He is no longer a brother, his actions took that away from him. In your quote... "that they may see your good works and glorify your father." Bad works = denial of the Father

I am not trying to offend or otherwise insult you guys, but the opposite. I want to understand the consequenses of his actions.

It hurts me that you are so willingly ready to bring him back into our fraternity. If he did this as a DeMolay; I would feel different and I would forgive him and after years of good work, I would take him by the hand and recommend him into the Masonic Lodge. However, as a Master Mason, this crime is unforgivable. He has violated the most sacred of sacred law; he has betrayed the trust a brother.

Again, he did it twice or more. So, was it a slip up... a oops mistake... bad call... No, Premeditated and planned.

Belial, I am glad that you found a new strength in the Army and I applaud you for serving our country. I served in the Navy. You are a patriot and my cousin. I wish you well, but it will be some time before I can, again, call you my brother. And I am very sorry that you felt that you could not confide in your brothers due to your pride. Somehow through your degrees, we failed to teach you that your pride should never stop you from confiding in a brother. For that, I apologize to you.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Cash Stocker,

the best of luck to u brother and i am with u pvt w one shot one kill willing to die but never will hooah!

Cash Stocker,

If a person confesses and is truly repentant, even if it's a debt that can NEVER be repaid, God forgives. So must we.

God goes after the one lost sheep of the flock. So must we.

God seeks to not only restore the broken, but to bless over and above. So must we.

DeMolay, and Masonry such as life isn't black and white. Though some would like it to be. You must view people by a whole person concept, and the same goes for situations. You must be aware of all the information before you can make a good decision. At the same time benefit of the doubt cannot be forgotten. None of us, but one knows the truth and facts behind what really happened in this situation, so for anyone of us to pass judgement would be unwise, as judgement seems to already have been passed on him, by him and those he has betrayed. Is he deserving of forgiveness, maybe...I don't know. That is not for us to decide, but those he had harmed, and for himself.

Eric,

I have a friend who lived with a man that beat her for 15 years. He would punch her and kick her then say, "I am sorry. Please forgive me." For 15 years, she did forgive him. For 15 years, she lived in a condition of constant ridicule and abuse; her life was unbearable. She left him six months ago, she if finally getting her self esteem and life back.

So, is she a bad person for not forgiving him?

This message has been edited. Last edited by: Cash Stocker,

Shawn,

I'm sorry. What I said was boiled down and way over simplified (but no less the truth). I'll be more expansive from now on. I had essentially written the same thing you did at one point, but I erased it at one something in the morning and opted for core truths instead, thinking that they would speak for themselves. Ooops.

You are absolutely correct in what you're saying. There is no way we can know all the particulars and it's not up to us to pass judgment and try to mete out our own little bit of justice on this forum. And I most whole heartedly agree that the "benefit of the doubt" is the watch phrase here. I do disagree a little bit regarding the statement on forgiveness though.

He has harmed us, not as individuals, but as a community of the whole. Any time a DeMolay or Mason makes these types of bad choices, it brings reproach upon the Order(s) and hurts all the respective members. There is also the matter of willing accountability to the whole. When he joined DeMolay and Masonry, he willingly made a choice to make himself accountable to members of those orders. When he joined this forum that is representative of the whole of DeMolay, he again made himself willingly accountable to us, and even more so since confession was most likely his almost singular intent when he joined.

In this situation, where a man has confessed his sin (against others and us) in our community representative of the whole and says he is actively turning his life around, we are most certainly within our right to extend the benefit of the doubt, offer grace and even express forgiveness. As evidenced by my over simplified answer yesterday, I'd say that it's our duty to do so. It will help him to move forward in a positive way to hear that, in spite of what he has confessed, we will not turn our backs and shun him forever, but instead will offer grace and help in pointing him toward the light even if he is no longer one of us.

Reply made to Cash Stocker in private regarding post about "a friend."

quote:

Reply

I am the advisor that was wronged by this person. Cash Stocker is right it was a total betrayal of trust, of his basic Masonic vows and of his DeMolay vows.
I hope he has turned his life around as he says he has, but he has lied about being in the military before and the e-mail address attached to his profile does not work.
I have forgiven the betrayal of trust and again I hope he has straightened his life out. But I can never again trust him as a brother